Thursday, June 17, 2004

Coordinating the Drug Swap

Got yer attention, didn't it? Ah well... sorry. Not that kind of a story, but here 'tis:

(Phone Call)

C: Angie? Hi, it's C from Dr. X's office returning your call.
A: Hey C, how's it goin'?
C: Great! So do you need me to drop by some more pills for you?
A: I was thinking I'd just run out there right after work tonight and pick them up.
C: Hmmm...we're closing at 5, so...
A: Rats!
C: I could drop them off at George's on my way home if you want.
A: Well, that might be a little awkward. Besides, I need to head out to the mall tonight and I don't want 'em just sitting in the bar.
C: Hey, I'm going to the mall tonight, too. I need to go to Vicky's for some new panties. Do you want to meet somewhere?
A: I'll be at the other end at Best Buy.
C: Tell you what, it'll take you at least 15 minutes to get out there, so I'll just run to Vicky's, pick up what I need and I'll meet you out front of Best Buy right around the time you should be rolling in. Does that sound ok?
A: Perfect! I'll see you out front!

First off, I want to say that I have the best shrink in the whole frikkin' world. I see him once every three months for about 15 minutes, we talk about his kids, what trips they've been on recently, my current love interest, work, etc., then I leave with a big ol' goodie bag of Lexapro. Yeah, it's hard to believe that I could be on anti-depressents since I have such a sparkling wit and demeanor. But I'm slowly teaching my brain to set free the seratonins without the aid of the little white pill (silly sticky hoarding little pack-rat of a brain).

BUT. Until such a time when Richard and I think there's no reason for me to be on these little happy pills, it's up to me to get my butt out to his office to pick them up, or make alternative arrangements which, at times, end up taking place in some of the most conspicuous places. I shouldn't bitch, though, since they're free. Since I've been on SSRIs, he's just given me samples so I don't have to go to the Rx. Heck, I'm already on a first name basis with the pharmacists at the Mercy Rx... between sinus infections, the dread cat bite, the scratched cornea and all my other most recent medical mysteries, I'm there at least twice a month it seems. Hmmm... it's a sign of getting older when you frequent a pharmacy more often than you do a record store...

I'm just too young to be this old. At least I can still laugh at all the ironies of life.

It ain't the years, babe, it's the miles. And as far as taking those happy pills...happiness is a state of mind. So, decide to be happy. Works for me. And when it doesn't, there's always heavy drinking.
Seriously though, speaking as a guy who knows nothing about you, do you ever think we are a little too quick to start popping prescription meds when we start having a rough time? I know so many people who are on anti-depressants, and when they describe the reasons to me, I'm like, "Yeah, so? That's how everyone feels. Life is hard, you're gonna get bummed sometimes."
Or else they just get defensive and say they need 'em and I don't understand. Which I guess I don't. But, and again, please take no offense, it just seems kinda screwed up to be taking pills that instead of letting you feel things unfiltered, just make you numb so you don't feel depressed.
On the other hand, there's no point in going through life miserable, and if the shrink and pills help make things better for ya, then more power to ya.
Glad you're posting again. Missed ya.
Hm. I just re-read my comments. I was going to delete them, because I'm worried you will be offended. I hope you won't be, because I am not saying you don't have legit reasons for seeing your doctor and taking your meds. The point I was going for and probably didn't make was that we as a society sure do take a lot of pills, and sometimes it seems like we don't have real reasons for that.
That's all.
Hey Jack,

No worries. I did not take offense at *anything* you said. In fact, I agree with you that, for the most part, we are INDEED a society that relies too much upon the quick fix. But, at the extreme risk of sounding hypocritical, there ARE people who really *need* medication (though I'm not saying -- while clawing at my arm frantically -- that *I* need it). I will eventually go off the stuff; your brain can actually become used to releasing seratonin so the pills become moot. Kinda like breaking a leg; your body will heal itself (with a little help).

But I want to address something else you said: " just seems kinda screwed up to be taking pills that instead of letting you feel things unfiltered, just make you numb so you don't feel depressed." Since I've started this little happy tour of SSRIs, let me just say that the LAST thing I feel is numb! For the first time in my life, I'm starting to feel more alive. This doesn't stop me from having extremely emotional times. My friend Marco has picked me up (literally) more than once when all I could do was cry. I don't know. I feel like I have all the same ups and downs as I did prior to the drugs, but it's much easier to come up out of it.

So, you make some strong and valid points that I can't disagree with. I sorta feel this way about all the kids these days that are being put on Ritalin for ADHD because the parents just can't handle them or they simply don't want to. (And to all parents out there with children who DO have ADD/ADHD and ARE on Ritalin, this IS NOT a slam on you in any way).

Anyhoo, thanks for your replies, Jack. I can tell you put a lot of thought behind what you were saying, and I appreciate it. **Big smile for the Texas cowboy**
Ya know...there were times I tried pickin’ ya up and you claimed to be content right where you were. Nothin' against your kitchen floor but I can think of many other places I'd rather be!
Yeah, it's true... I'm a very content gal in the kitchen. Even if I'm lying on the floor.

Ahh yes..... Happy pills, know them well. Sometimes my world is all cloudy, and I feel so heavy and tired. Life takes too much energy... I dont care about anything. Happy pills can help, believe me I know.

Hey Jack. DRUGS ARE COOL! LOL We still love ya though
Hey Vadergrrrl,

Many thanks for the thumbs up AND for the link. I had a conversation with a friend of mine the other night and he told me that he thought blogs were 'self-indulgent'. Ok, I can buy that. But is being self-indulgent all that bad? Makes me feel good to rant, bitch, moan or tell stories I think are funny, mundane or *whatever*. Kinda like takin' my little happy pill every morning...

BLOG ON, baby!
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