Thursday, May 04, 2006


My neighbor Bob had a century maple taken down this week. I call it a century maple because this tree was easily four-five stories tall and as big around as three sumo wrestlers. Sucker was huuuuge, is what I'm sayin'.

The pros of this tree's demise are:
1) No more frikkin' maple buds will shower my car, driveway and house. Every time it rains, my downspouts spew this crap out like bloody effluvia.
2) I will not have to rake those leaves out of my yard come fall. For the record, I raked up two huge piles of them last fall... then left them. Yes, I recently purchased some grass seed. I'm going to need it.
3) There will be more sun for my herb garden and the callas.

The cons of this tree's demise are:
1) Everyone who drives on Governor has a view right into my back yard that was previously blocked. All my neighbors will now know with what kind of juice I mix my vodka and the brand of beer I favor.
2) Now I have an extraordinarily ugly view of the street (kind of) and the rental house across the street from Bob.
3) Well, it was a darn pretty tree. I'm sad to see it gone. Plus, all the squirrels are now really confused.

The solution: a trellis. But what to grow?

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